The Cork - Matthew 5:3

I got my coffee all doctored so it tasted like a dessert.  I sat down with my Bible, my journal and my colored pencils ready for lots of juicy notes.  I was puffed up with the excitement of how I was going to ROCK the Beatitudes like nobody’s business.  Right, so let’s see...  “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven.”  Inner monologue:  Hmmm… nothing coming to me.  Poor?  Poor in spirit?  I thought these were all about squeezing the fullness out of life?  Well, maybe this one needs to go with the next one to make sense.  “Blessed are those who mourn...”  Mourning.  Grieving.  Ooookay.  Hmmm…  The truth of it is, I had no idea. I always thought of the Beatitudes (and really the whole ‘faith thing’) as a list of things TO DO/TO BE that would make me ‘good’ and my life ‘blessed’.  Me, Myself and I – oh yes, we can kick booty on some to-do’s.  So, as I sat there all Suzy-Spiritual and ready to get my Christian on, you can imagine the jolt that came when I realized that there is actually nothing I can do.  The Message interprets this verse “Blessed are you when you are at the end of your rope.  When there is less of you, there is more of God.”  William Barclay paraphrases, “Blessed is the man who has realized his own utter helplessness, and who has put his whole trust in God.”  It turns out that the beatitudes are less about adding to the list of MY accomplishments and more about letting go.

This is where it’s so easy to say, ‘I just don’t get it’ and move on.  But remember when and how these words were whispered… on a hillside, friend to friend, in the midst of a culture clamoring for freedom and happiness, a culture much like our own.  In the story, the Disciples followed a ‘trending’ Jesus off the big stage of familiarity and into intimacy.  To ‘get this’, we must do the same.  We have to shut out the noises of our busy world and take a silent minute to consider this question: if God made me, maybe He knows exactly what I need, when I will need it, and how I can get it.  And if so, consider His words, “Blessed are the poor in spirit.”

Picture yourself as an empty wine bottle.  Inside you have come up with the perfect plan for what is going to give you happiness.  You create a diet/exercise routine, you immerse yourself in all sorts of do-good/feel-good activities, you read self-help books...  You figure it all out, and then you put a cork in the top so that you don’t lose control of your plan.  And then you float around in your little life.  You read about how you are supposed to feel this soul-deep happiness; but even though you are doing all the right things, you still feel empty.

This verse is asking each of us to let go of all our plans, our prejudices, our I-can-do-this-my-way’s.  It’s asking us to sit down with Jesus and say, “Will You do this for me?”  This verse says, take out the cork.  And as you do, the blessing-water, the Heaven-kingdom-goodness-that-really-satisfies fills that bottle, bit by bit.  You don’t even know what or where it is coming from, but as you let go, Jesus flows in and you sink into soul-deep meanings, and you find that you are truly blessed.

Soul-Deep Happiness for the Swirling Girls of the New Year

It is January. A new year.  Days of new beginnings and fresh starts. These are here-we-go kind of days.  And revving the engine of the New Year are all our hopes and dreams for what the next 12 months may hold -- a healthier body, a new accomplishment, a desire to live life fully.  Without knowing every person’s resolutions, it is safe to say that they all revolve around this idea of betterment.  We resolve to do things that we believe will make us happier on the inside and out.  No matter who we are.

This universal New Year perspective is dear to me.  So precious that no matter where we are, who we know, what our circumstances, our desires all come back to this basic craving for soul-deep happiness.  And how utterly amazing that there is a God that knows this about all of humanity, and even more so, that He gave us a Book that would guide us to the answers every heart yearns to know.

In Matthew 5:3-10, it’s as if Jesus sits down with His peeps and whispers, do you want to know the key a blessed life, a soul-deep happy life?  I will tell you…

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Boom.  There it is.  That’s the secret.  It’s just that it doesn’t look like what I thought it would.  In fact, I sort of want to disagree and plead the whole He-can’t-mean-this-literally thing.  That was clearly a different culture, right?  But when I look at what was going on, I think He means every word precisely.  When Jesus spoke these words to His disciples, it was at the beginning of His ministry.  He was starting to gather huge crowds, and His ministry was all the buzz.  (Let’s just say Jesus was trending.)  The crowds wanted healing (better bodies); they wanted freedom (financial, spiritual and political); they wanted to live happy, full lives in the midst of hard circumstances.   Hmmm… That sounds rather familiar.  Don’t we all ponder what it is that will make us feel complete, make us happy? What will most bless our kids, our bodies?  What will heal our relationships?

The buzz then was that this Jesus just might be able to deliver.  And from the midst of a swirling culture where everyone was chattering about what or whom was going to save them from their own little (or big) messes, Jesus pulled aside to a quiet hillside and offered the key to a blessed life.   And as easy as it would be for me to dismiss these verses as irrelevant, I must at least entertain the possibility that the words whispered on that hillside may in fact be very relevant indeed to a girl also wind-blown by the swirling culture all around her.  Could it be that these words offer soul-deep happiness to this Pinterest-perusing, Facebook-stalking, all-the-time-texting, desperate-to-look-just-right, determined-to-get-it-together woman in 2015?

Well, there’s one way to find out.  Will you join us every other Monday as we dig into these 8 verses?   Let’s see if words spoken over 2000 years ago could ring true in this New Year.  Everyone is welcome.  Come as you are.

Her Secret - Proverbs 31:10-31

Even with the gap of several thousand years between when Proverbs was written and today, one thing is abundantly clear.  Women have always been busy multi-taskers whose work is never done.  If ever we thought that Jesus did not understand the workload of a woman, we now know that is not true.   These words are manna to frazzled women everywhere saying, “I understand, I see.” That said, the Proverbial wife is a Rock Star.  In reading these verses, we see a woman whose husband trusts her, who is a hard worker, and who brings in food from far away lands (probably organic).  She is an entrepreneur who turns a profit.  She gets up early, and she stays up late.  Her kids are prepared for bad weather, because she has organized the glove and hand-me-down closet.  She is kind to the needy, and she is dressed in beautiful clothes.  She sounds perfect, so it is very easy to set her aside as made-up, unattainable and, therefore, irrelevant; but then we would miss our manna.  I think she is offering us her secret.

There is a depth to her that goes beyond the things she does.  Indeed, more than what she does is the spirit of how she does it. Verse 25 says, “Strength and dignity are her clothing, she smiles at the future.”  It is this verse that makes me stop and read it all again imagining her laughing as she goes, and yet doing everything with great strength and dignity.  By smiling at the future, we know this woman is doing laundry, dishes, housework, and community service with a lightness of knowing that such work is simply part of something all together bigger and more lasting.  And with strength and dignity as her clothing, we see a woman assured of a worth far beyond stocked cupboards and swept floors.

If we were to list the things we do in the course of our days, we could be labeled:

cook chauffeur tutor coach psychologist closet organizer housekeeper personal shopper banker decorator nurse...

We do a bit of all these things, but we cannot do everything to mastery every day. As such, in our exhaustion, we can easily begin to limp through our days feeling only the drudgery - no dignity, no smiling. So, how does this Proverbial wife do this with a head held so high?

One of the hardest questions for me to answer is: what do you do?  I look at the floor and mumble something about being a mom and a wife.  My mind swims with both the magnitude of my chores and the ambiguity of my ‘label’.  I am answerless.  And I think this is the difference between me and this Rock Star Wife .  In her heart and mind, she is quite sure of who she is.  While she does in fact perform all these mundane tasks, these do not define her.  Instead, I think she has written God’s word on the tablet of her heart, and she claims boldly in the depth of who she is the labels that God Himself has given her.

They are labels like this:

Bride of Christ Daughter to the King Daughter-in-law to the King Beloved Aroma of Christ Ambassador of Heaven City on a Hill Light of the world Dwelling of the Holy Spirit Hands and Feet of Jesus Disciple of Christ Headed for heaven with a room being prepared Prized and adored by the King of Kings Worth fighting for, worth dying for

These are the labels she wakes up clinging to.  It is with these labels that she brings great dignity and lightness to her work.  Yes, indeed, for these current days she may serve as a midnight baby nurse and a housekeeper, but she is doing so as the Daughter to the King.  To be sure, she will spend time in the classroom tomorrow, but she is doing so as an Ambassador from Heaven.  She knows that the first list of labels lasts only for a blink, but the second list lasts for all of eternity.   And so she is clothed in dignity, and, yes, indeed, she smiles at the future. And here is our manna:  these are our labels too.

The Field of Faith - Proverbs 17

Sometimes studying scripture can feel prickly. In studying Proverbs I have felt like a football player in the game of life who keeps getting penalties called on her thoughts, words and actions. Bright yellow flags are flung in the rooms of my heart and mind. There is a contentious referee broadcasting my mistakes with demonstrative arm movements, “Penalty on Katie Koon. Destructive use of her tongue, hostile reaction in anger, and ridiculous amount of time fearing what her friends think.” I read the words of instruction. I see how I don’t live like these words. I pray that I would do the words next time. Then, I get up to start a new day, and in the prophetic words of Britney Spears, “oops I did it again.” Bright…. yellow… flags…everywhere. Here’s the truth about yellow flags. I learned it from my sons who are playing football through a simple city league. Yellow flags show that you are in the game. My boys get flags called on them when they are on the field -- under the eye of the ref, trying to obey the coach, working towards the goal of doing their very best in the game of football. They are 9 and 10 years old. They don’t even know all the rules of the game; and they are certainly not superstars; but they are on that field. If they were not in the game, there would be no flags.

Proverbs 17:3 “the refining pot is for silver and the furnace for gold, but the Lord tests hearts.”

Ladies, these Proverbs prickle because we are on the field of faith, and that is a wonderful, beautiful, everlasting thing! We have signed up to give this game a try. We are reading the Playbook, we are listening to the Coach, we are showing up for practice, and we are choosing to live life on His field according to His Words. The fact that we feel the pinch of the flag shows that He is teaching us, and shows that our hearts are hearing. Better than silver, more valuable than gold, that our hearts are committed to living on His field makes them worth strengthening, worth testing, worth cleansing. “The Lord disciplines those He loves.”

Here’s a second truth about flags. In one week, I watched the same penalties called on my boys get called on middle school boys 5 years older, on college boys 10 years older who were seasoned enough be playing on national TV, and on professional men 20 years older who get paid millions of dollars to play the same game. At every level, the penalties were all the same. The NFL hero gets called “off sides” just as my son does. God gave me a great wink in this. The point is not about perfection, for that will only be reached on the far side of the clouds; the point is to stay in the game. Play by His rules. Live out His words. Choose His field.

Jennifer Steele shared her most frequent prayer these days as a mother in the trenches, “help me, help me, help me.” What a wonderful prayer for every woman on the field of faith. In the game, eyes toward the Coach, seeing the yellow flags, wanting to obey, oh-so-aware of how quickly we stumble, but always believing that there is help within reach. Jesus knew there would be flags as we lived this life on His field. When we see the flag/feel the prick and turn to Him for forgiveness and help, He picks up the flag and offers a clean field once again. Like a mama on the sidelines watching her little boy on the field, He is watching us and with everything He has He is whispering, “I am for you! Keep at it. Stay with me. Oh how I love you!”

Rightly Related and Possibly Unplugged - Proverbs 12-15

Proverbs 14:2 “Whoever fears the Lord walks uprightly”

Proverbs 12:5 “The plans of the righteous are just…”

Proverbs 12:6 “The speech of the upright deliver them…”

Proverbs 13:6 “Righteousness guards the person of integrity”

Proverbs 12:26 “The righteous choose their friends carefully.”

Proverbs 12:28 “In the way of righteousness is life…”

In these Proverbs, there is much said about “righteous” or “upright” living. To live righteously in simplest terms means to live rightly-related to Jesus. This means taking Him with us as we go, listening to His voice, letting His words dwell richly in us, fixing our gaze on Him as we go about our lives, and making Him the true focal point of our lives. Our original challenge of MANNA was to DO the words, not just read them. This call to righteousness – to being rightly connected to God - can get stuck in my head, and not make it into my heart, my feet, my hands, my tongue. I can make my list of verses like we did in our Great Eight, but just leave them there. Very quickly, I can become a gather-er of the Manna, and not actually EAT it. I know how I am supposed to live, but I am not actually doing that.

If I am real honest about what has my focus and what I am connected to on any given day, I will tell you that it is a lot of J-U-N-K . In fact, the thing that I am most connected to is my phone. It rarely leaves my side. I check in with it all…the…time. It is a bottomless pit of fodder, and it seems to be an overwhelming pull or tug to a path far away from the one described in these chapters. From the flat screen of my phone, I can slander my brother, mock my neighbor, ignore my friend, covet strangers, flirt with an old boyfriend, feed the rumor mill, and frivolously spend time and money on things that have absolutely zero righteous value. And truth be told, I can do this in the parking lot outside of Bible Study.

It is terrifying to me that we are told to watch our tongues because they are like “a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body” capable of devouring entire forests with just a spark, and yet our culture has offered up more ways than ever to spout off. Without being inherently wrong, the age in which we live has made it increasingly difficult to live righteously.

The tree of the knowledge of good and evil from which Eve was so tempted to eat and from which God had specifically told her not to eat is described as a ‘delight to the eyes and desirable to make one wise.”   I say this so humbly, but that is exactly how I would describe my phone.

So, what if one way to choose the righteous path was to pick up the phone one time less? What if we prayed as rapidly as we texted? What if we prayed in our cars in carpool instead of instagrammed? What if we paused to thank God for the beauty of the nature, the smell of a newborn baby before we waded onto Pinterest? What if we knocked on a friend’s door and told her what a great mother she is, what a great friend she is, how you love watching her live – instead of ‘liking’ them (or silently stalking her) on Facebook? What if we fasted from our phones for even just three hours out of the day and re-connected with Jesus instead?

A challenge: Sometimes to pick up something new, we have to put something else down. Our hands can only hold so much. And the same is true with our minds and hearts. If our desire is to live righteously, wholly and rightly connected to Jesus, what is one thing you could let go of/put down/turn off in hopes of making space for Jesus Christ? Your ‘thing’ may have nothing to do with smart phones. Think about what you ‘carry’ around with you most in your heart and your mind or how you spend your time, and consider putting that down and picking up Jesus. I think He is shouting to us all…. ‘just try Me!’ I can’t wait to hear what you find…

The Great Eight

When I started reading through the Proverbs, I realized that I kept seeing the same instructions or pearls of wisdom repeated in different chapters, on different days. It reminded me of my Grocery List: milk, eggs, coffee, chocolate, cheese, bananas, bread, OJ… These are things that I need every week. They are always on my list, because they make my family work. The fact that I got milk last week is completely irrelevant to the fact I need milk this week. Similarly, the fact that I prayed for wisdom last week about this Bible study has no baring on the fact that I must seek it again this week for a hardship with a friend. Wisdom is always on my Grocery List of prayer. The same should be said of control for my tongue. This, in fact, should be put on automatic delivery. I wish they had Amazon Prime, hourly-automatic-delivery for tongue control. These are my eight themes, my Great Eight. Yours may be different. You may have a Top Ten, an Excellent Eleven, or a Fab Five (or Fifty). It doesn’t really matter what happens to be your list or how many, it is just key to have one. Because we all know what happens when we go to the grocery store without a list, you come home with Oreos and no dinner. So make a list as you mine these chapters, look for your themes, your repeat go-to heart tugs. I made a column for each theme and I wrote out verses that fell under each one. They are reminders to me, a Grocery List for the Heart that keeps me from wandering aimlessly in the aisles of life. They are sustenance; they are mile markers and exit ramps to help me get through the day and stay on track.

For these next 4 weeks, if you commit to reading about 10 verses a day, 5 days a week, you will cover 6 chapters. Go slowly, listen as you read. What tugs at your heart, what might your “cupboard of your heart” be in need of? Make your own Grocery List. The aisles of Proverbs are never ending. There is Manna to last a lifetime.

My Great Eight

• Wisdom/Understanding, how to find it, what it looks like to live with it, its value
• Making plans and how to have success with them
• Hard work and its importance in living rightly
• How to handle !!!ANGER!!!, Anxiety (and other extreme emotions)
• Our tongues and what to do about our speech
• The importance of discipline and seeking counsel and the company we keep)
• Heart Issues, the importance of how we keep, tend to, focus on the matter in our and of our hearts
• Upright living – how to live ‘rightly’ from God’s perspective and the importance of doing so

The Activity of the Heart - Proverbs 3 & 4

Proverbs 3 1 let your heart keep my commandments 3 do not let kindness and truth leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart 5 trust in the Lord with all your heart…

Proverbs 4

4 Let your heart hold fast to my words. 6 Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you. 7 The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. 8 Cherish her, and she will exalt you; embrace her, and she will honor you. 21 …Keep them [my words] in the midst of your heart 23 watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.

Proverbs 4:7 says, “The beginning of wisdom is GET WISDOM.” Hmmmm… This sounds like an explanation my 5 year-old nephew would give my 6 year-old daughter. “Just get it!” I cannot say that I fully understand this. Where do I get it? What does it look like? How do I carry it?   How does it work?

But as we take a step back and comb through the verses of these chapters, there seems to be a great deal of focus on the heart. It is so easy for us to get stuck in our heads. That is where our lists live and where our life plans formulate. These verses, however, are filled with arrows pointing to a deeper place where emotion lives, where desires dwell, where the swirlings of something bigger begin, and where faith actually is born. These verses are telling us that if we want to live this life wisely, if we want to live out this faith we profess in church clothes on Sunday, we must engage the heart. So interesting, I think. Wisdom seems to be of the brain, but His ways are not our ways. These words tell us that wisdom, in fact, flows from the heart.

The trick is that our hearts, left on their own, can be fooled, derailed, broken, misguided. So, for us to live wisely, we must fill our hearts with this wisdom-substance that transcends our human nature. The beginning of wisdom is get wisdom. In Proverbs 8, it talks a great deal about the origin of wisdom. It says that Wisdom has always been. Wisdom was there with the creation of the world. In 1 Cor. 1:24 and 30, we are told that Christ is/became the wisdom of God. In Colossions 2:3, it says that in Christ are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.

When this Proverb tells us that the beginning of wisdom is GET WISDOM, I think it is saying simply, Get Jesus. Without Jesus, there is no wisdom. There is teaching, and there is advice. We can be ‘smart’ in the way we make practical decisions. We can live a visibly successful life based on the teachings of Jesus, but for us to live a life understanding deeply what is right and what is good, trusting in the promise of an eternity with no tears even in the midst of tragic circumstances, guided by a Voice that intends to use all things for good in our lives, supported by a strength that has already conquered death – for us to live a life transformed by wisdom, we must not simply read about wise things with our heads, we must LOVE Her [Wisdom], cherish her, embrace her with all our hearts.

For us to “acquire wisdom”, we must let go of the duty of “doing” the right thing and go far deeper to a love affair with the person Who IS wisdom.

So, I want to tell you a story. I have this friend. We have Bible studied and prayed together for years. She is a faithful woman. She keeps her quiet time. She does all the right things. She works at clinging to wisdom and all that good stuff. She was telling me the neatest story the other day. She went home after carpool to do her quiet time. And she said, “Katie, I was blown away with His presence. I have been running around trying “to do” the right thing all this time. I have been wanting it, but missing it somehow. And it was like I felt Him touch me. It was so tender. He has been so patient with me. Just watching me run in and out. Sitting down to “do” my Bible study, then getting up and going to do my thing. And I had missed Him, but He was always there.”

I love this story because it takes all these crazy teachings and words and boils it down to this: there is a Man named Jesus who loves you completely. He wants to spend time with you, He wants to live life with you, and in the course of spending time with Him, He will tell you all that He knows. We can write words, hear words, talk words, and even “do” words. But for our hearts to fully engage, there must be more than words. There must be a Person, a Presence.

If we think of Jesus as Wisdom, the know-er and understand-er and creator of all things, imagine how our worlds can change when we walk through life with Him. It’s like going to the symphony with Mozart, like visiting the Louvre with Van Gogh, like shopping with the perfect decorator, parenting with the perfect parent, like talking to the perfect listener, serving alongside the perfect servant. Living life with this Wisdom/Jesus, changes everything. This wisdom is saying that I long to exalt you (vs. 8), honor you (vs.8), present you with a crown of beauty (vs.9). This wisdom isn’t chores. The satisfaction of living with this Wisdom is far greater than finishing our to-do list. This wisdom is LOVE. This Wisdom whispers as we go and live our lives…’I love you, I have plans for you, I have gifted you, I have prepared you.’ This Wisdom says, I am here for YOU! “Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.” Jer. 33:3

With that, King Solomon is saying this Voice is worth listening to because not only is it smart talk but because this Voice LOVES you.   So, we must cling to it, bind it around our necks, embrace it, trust in it. It’s hard to get excited about commands, about to-do’s; but a heart can cling to Love.

A last thought. Proverbs 4:24 instructs us to “watch over our hearts with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.” I think about what that looks like, because even knowing all that has been discussed here, I confess that I can so easily get off path. It’s not bad stuff, but what I like to call my ‘mini-obsessions’ take over and I am no longer talking with the Resident of my heart. Instead, I have left Him quite alone while I go off and ‘sort some things out’. Why do I do that? Knowing what I know, believing what I believe about Jesus, why in the world would I forsake Him in these trivial ways?

I asked a quirky ensemble of Godly women about their mini-obsessions. What makes you take your eyes off Jesus? What makes you stop engaging with the King Resident of your heart? The most interesting answers came back.   One friend said that in all that she wants to do for the Lord, she takes it as a burden thinking the work depends on her not on Him. Another friend confessed that she gets obsessed about getting organized. A third said it was the news. She can go on news binges and feast on world news fodder. Another claimed her families’ activities, another her to-do list. Here is the kicker: these are their gifts. For each woman, I saw her mini-obsession as an extension of the way God has uniquely gifted her. These are nowhere near my aesthetic obsessions, nor are they anywhere close to my gifts. I am not at all tempted to go off kilter about these things. Organization is never going to be the lover that busts up me and Jesus. World events are beyond my pea brain’s contemplations. But I will get in a tizzy tinkering in my home, and completely miss the joy God intended of having someone come and sit with me in it.

Proverbs 3:15 & 18 “She [wisdom] is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire compares to her.   She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her, and those who hold her fast will be blessed.”

In this, I hear God speaking gently and lovingly to us ladies. I hear Him saying, I know all that you are desiring, I understand why you want to get that list done, have that party, serve that someone. I know all that is good about that desire. I also know what is wrong about that desire. Let that heady list integrate with the Wisdom/Love of your heart. Your little tailspins are simply your little jaunts away from Me. I will be like a tree of life (3:18), a spring of life (4:23) in the midst of all your doing. What feels like drudgery can become joy. I came that you might have life and have it to the fullest. Take…. Me…. With… You…

Loving Wisdom vs. Doing Duty

• What part of your faith feels like duty? Whatever feels like drudgery or obligatory work, take it to Jesus and ask Him how you are thinking of it wrongly. Psalm 1 tells us that the law of the Lord should be a delight. If it is not, we are off track. Consider asking just one friend how she finds delight in scripture.
• As American women, we are especially good at striving and achieving. Proverbs 3 almost seems like a letter to a girl heading off to college, telling her the secret to success. The challenges listed here can feel still and quiet and maybe off-the-radar. They are inward. In what ways might we have forsaken this inward growth to achieve on the exterior glory of being productive? This isn’t asking us to stop our lives. It is asking us to focus on/cling to these words AS WE GO. What is one way that we could make this inner clinging our top priority – higher even than our going and achieving?

If, Then - Proverbs 2:1-11

Ever since I had children and got into the lovely habit of holding a baby in one arm, with a bottle in the hand of that same arm, with my phone wedged between my ear and my shoulder so that my other hand could be free to push the swing, I have had issues with my posture. Alignment issues, let’s just say. Now, even 6 years since my last bottle-feeding, I am only just beginning to straighten up. And that is only thanks to my husband. You see, for my 42nd birthday, my husband gave me an unlimited month pass to this new exercise place. (I did not take this personally. He is an exercise junky while I am a coffee/chocolate/cheese junky. I give chocolates and cookies to make people feel good. He gives gym passes. It is what it is.) Nonetheless, because this pass would expire after one month, I felt like I had to really get in there and make the most of it. Plus, I knew that exercise was – in fact - a good thing, if slightly foreign to my daily routine. After all, it is pretty much universally accepted that IF you exercise, THEN you feel better, healthier. Although I committed to attend frequently, I was still of the attitude that there is no way you will convert me to one of you exercise people, I am just here for ONE month. You hear me? I will not be sucked into this cult like behavior.

But the funniest thing happened. After several classes, I started to feel better. I felt stronger. My posture improved. I had more energy. I was going so frequently, I had to buy more exercise clothes; hence, to the outside world, I looked different, like an exerciser. I started arranging my schedule so I could make it to more classes, so the patterns of my day changed. I even downloaded the APP that goes with the gym! (Please don’t tell anyone that.) I started thinking about my core/posture muscles as I sat, as I walked, as I stood. I could feel when I was slouching and autocorrect.

At the end of the month, prepare yourself, I SIGNED MYSELF UP FOR ANOTHER MONTH. I know, it is shocking. I am still freaked out at myself. And it all started by giving one class a try.

I tell you this deep and profound story for two reasons. First, to address the IF/THEN parts of scripture and life. I love a conditional sentence. It is absolute. I know what I am getting into. IF you work hard, THEN you do better in school. IF you are kind, THEN you will make friends. The thing is that I knew that if/then of exercise to be true, but I still didn’t want to do it.   When we are on the IF side of something, having never tasted how sweet the THEN is, it just seems foreign, ridiculous, big-sigh-eye-roll what-are-they-doing-over-there-anyways? If left alone, we generally don’t want to exercise or be nice when others are not being nice.   We don’t like the IF part. We want the THEN without the IF. But if we will submit ourselves to the conditional truth, if we will take the deep breath and readjust ourselves so that we DO the IF, the THEN makes the IF lovely, divine, even pleasurable.

Which brings me to my second reason for telling this story. Posture. It is easier to slouch, it is my habit. It is my habit physically, but it is my habit spiritually also. It is so easy after a lifetime and a culture that encourages spiritual slouching to stay in that hunched over position. It is way easier to go along with what everyone else is doing on Facebook , than it is to gather the Manna, listen to its teachings, mull over its truths, cling to its instructions. But, how much we stand to miss.

Proverbs 2:1-11 gives us a glorious IF/THEN –

(vs. 1-4) IF [you] will:

• receive my sayings
• treasure my commandments within you
• make your ear attentive to wisdom
• incline your heart to understanding
• cry for discernment
• lift your voice for understanding
• seek for [wisdom] as silver
• search for [wisdom] as hidden treasure

Look at this list of Ifs. I don’t know about you, but when I see that list, I see what a spiritual slouch I am. I see that my spiritual posture has been compromised by a life spent trying to ‘fit in’. I am all hunched over looking at the Internet, listening to neighborhood gossip, watching the celebrities, reading the self-help books. And if I am honest, those if’s sounds really hard. They sound like a spiritual version of those yoga positions where all the body parts are going the wrong way.

Let me tell you, the first exercise class was not fun. I did not look like I belonged (wore totally wrong clothes), I did not act like I belonged (no one else had to lie down on the floor to regain breath and balance), I did not feel like I belonged (let’s just call it an internal earthquake). It is not easy to change a life long habit or to start a new one. But GOD! You turn to Him, and He will meets you right where you are. Pray to Him, and He will answer. IF you will just begin to get into this posture of feeding on His word…

(vs. 5) THEN you will: DISCOVER THE KNOWLEDGE OF GOD.

This is pretty awesome. I mean, God is all-knowing; so discovering the knowledge of God is a pretty much jackpot. But what is even better is the bonus that follows.

“For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.” vs 6 So this is telling me that this discovery of knowledge is GIVEN straight from the mouth of Jesus. These Proverbs that are available to everyone, shouted from the town square (Prov. 1: 20) all of the sudden get personal. As I get into this posture of Ifs, I receive wisdom from God’s mouth straight to my heart. And as we grow in wisdom, maintaining this new posture as we come and as we go, we find He is always there, protecting, guiding, teaching. Note the present tense of these verses:

( vs. 7) He stores up wisdom for the upright

(vs. 7) He is a shield to those who walk in integrity

(vs. 8) Guarding the paths of justice

(vs. 8) He preserves the way of His godly ones

I just love that this wisdom thing isn’t a one-time delivery. Because then I would surely ask, what am I supposed to do with this? Just as I will wait some time before I pass on marital wisdom to my 9 year old son, God remains with us as we walk, as we seek, as we live – ready to give us wisdom as we need it.

And as we walk with Jesus eager for His wisdom, desiring His presence, longing for His guidance, the posture that once seemed foreign, awkward, uncomfortable becomes pleasurable. “Wisdom will enter your heart and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul.” Vs. 10

God’s presence does not come with the requirement of perfection. It starts with just a tilt of the heart, a tiny leaning of the ears, a mere shift of the eyes… And as we tilt, lean, shift, He enters in. And we see that the IF was part of the THEN all along.

Some at-home exercises for us slouchers…

• During my class, the teacher reminds us to suck in our tummies, spread our shoulders, tighten our fanny… With each reminder, I get into a better position, one that works by body harder, makes it stronger. Look at that list of ifs as a way of adjusting your spiritual posture. What is one adjustment you/I can make to change our daily posture away from a contorted one feeding on the world to a righteous one searching for God?
• What is one thing that I am seeking desperately – “successful” children, popularity, wealth – that has my spiritual posture contorted? And what if I spent that kind of energy seeking for wisdom?

Fearing God Most of All - Proverbs 1

Our society is consumed by healthy living.  Organic food.  Power vegetables. Yoga. Cardio. CrossFit. Pilates. Limited sugar (dagger to my heart). Limited soft drinks (full body blow). In some form, I am sure every reader of these words can attest to the truth that at least one of these things has an enormous impact on your purchasing decisions, your allocation of time, your conversations. There is a part of you that BELIEVES that more exercise will strengthen your body, that certain foods will make you healthy.  In fact, your belief is so strong, so down-to-your-core real, that there is a FEAR of departing from it.  You believe in food so strongly, in healthy living so fully that there is a fear that if you do not eat these foods, or do this exercise that your health may suffer, your body may not be quite-so-sleek.  The belief is good, but it is the FEAR of not having it that compels your behavior. I think when the Proverbs talk about “fear of God,” this is where they are coming from. We should never be afraid of God, just like we should not be afraid of kale.  Kale is good for you.  God is good, and He is good for you.  In fact, He is awesome.  He is all-powerful and full joy and total peace.  In fact, it is because He is so good, and His plans are so perfect that we should fear NOT being close to Him.  We should fear being separate from Him.

Like Solomon, I have to get to this place where I see how small I am, and how big He is.  I don’t understand the bigness of this world, the enormousness of poverty and injustice.  I can’t fathom how to soothe the heartache of those suffering. I am just a selfish girl who tells white lies and wants to impress those around me – but STILL He has lavished upon me countless blessings.  Despite my smallness, God has been so good to me.  I have grown babies in my womb, I have experienced that heart connection of true friendship that goes too deep for words, I see oceans and smell roses. It is all God. And He is so big, so GOOD.  What would life be like without Him?  I don’t want to know.  So I cling to Him.  I am, in fact, FEARFUL of life without Him.

Solomon says in Proverbs 1:7, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of all knowledge.” He does not mean we fear the Lord and keep Him at arm’s length, it means we are so in awe of His power, so blown away by His love for this mucked up girl obsessed with how her tushy looks in spandex, so taken aback by the decoration of this earth, so mystified that He would leave Heaven to defeat death and sin in a battle that tops all battles, so excited to see what would happen if I would really TAKE HIM IN that I am FEARFUL of being apart, of turning away, of looking any other direction but His.

If we go back to the healthy living analogy, we, in our health-obsessed culture, look at lack of exercise and poor eating habits as a serious social issue. [Full disclosure: I love Cheetos and Mountain Dew; so this is not a judgement from me.] Frankly, knowing what we know about the body and health, we, as a culture, believe it is borderline stupid to eat primarily processed foods and to live a sedentary lifestyle.  We have great anxiety about lack of exercise.  The fitness of our flesh is of enormous importance.  We are fearful, no, I would say we are PETRIFIED of chemically tainted foods and muscles left un-toned.  And this is all for a body that has a shelf life anyway.  Newsflash: the fanny is going to sag.  It’s a thing called gravity. BUT, we are promised not only life after this life and rewards that last forever, but also a full and joyful life NOW, wisdom now, comfort now if we will abide by the teachings of our Heavenly Father, if we will live feeding on His word, if we seek this His wisdom wholeheartedly.

Like our culture is calling for a bold CHANGE in our lifestyle habits toward healthy living, this Manna, this word is crying out for a radical repentance, an ABOUT FACE on what is propelling us in our lives.  Our Heavenly Father via King Solomon is telling us to stop, turn around, fix our eyes, our goals, our desires on this GREAT, GOOD God.  Crave Him so much that you are afraid to be apart from Him.  And here is the caramel sauce on top… are you ready?  Drum roll, please.  When we turn, when we open our hands and our hearts and say, tell me what to do, tell me how to live, He says, it is done.

Proverbs 1:22-23, “Simpletons! How long will you wallow in ignorance?
 … Idiots! How long will you refuse to learn?
  About face! I can revise your life.
Look, I’m ready to pour out my spirit on you;
I’m ready to tell you all I know.” The Message

He is ready to tell you all that He knows.  That is Manna for a lifetime.  It is spiritual sustenance to last forever, literally, an eternity.  It is answers to every question.  It is peace for every persecution.  It is joy for every sorrow.  It is forgiveness for every sin.  It is total.  It is complete.  It is all that we need or will ever need.  It is all that we want or will ever want.

So, in hearing this truth that fear of the Lord is the beginning of all knowledge and this cry to do an about face on what we are craving, what we are feeding on, I think we have to stop and ask ourselves:

• What do I fear living without more than God?  What do I cling to ‘to make my life work’ more than His presence?  Exercise? A particular diet?  A beautiful life? Material success? My appearance?  If I examine my thoughts, my checkbook, my calendar, what is compelling me more than being near God?
• How have I misunderstood God?  In light of what He offered Solomon and what He is offering us, how have I discounted what He longs to give me?  He says He wants to tell us all he knows.  Scripture tells us that He can give us more than we can possibly ask or imagine.  What have I placed as higher value than His words?
• What is one way that I can do an ABOUT FACE and turn to feed on God?  If a spiritual nutritionist could dissect my heart, what might she say to ‘cut out’?

Proverbs as Manna

If you are like me, your mind flips back to practicality. The LIST, the PLAN. How? What is the path that takes me from the wilderness of my life as a Christian-in-name but with the anxiety, worry, weariness of one lost -- to the life promised that includes peace that surpasses understanding, joy to the fullest, hope and rest? Give me the coordinates so I can put it in my GPS. I will meet you there at 9am, after my exercise class but before preschool pick-up. Yes, where to start… Timothy 3:16-17 says, “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” All of God’s word is Manna. But you have to start somewhere, and one place to start is in the Proverbs. They are succinct words of wisdom that we can live by, that we can put into practice. So simple, like Manna, the Proverbs offer these little nuggets of truth – simple and powerful – and if we will pick them up, and take them in, and live by them, we will live fully.

Interesting story, the Proverbs. They were written by King Solomon, son of King David. In 1Kings 3:6-10, God speaks to Solomon in a dream and He says, “Ask what you wish me to give you.” That’s pretty cool. Open ended. I love it. And King Solomon first starts by thanking God for all He did for King David, and how He never left him, and how He always loved David. He goes on to say that it is only because God gave David a son that Solomon himself is now king. He comes from this place of great humility and he says, “Thou has made thy servant king in place of my father David, yet I am but a little child; I do not know how to go out or come in.”

Who hasn’t felt like that in the midst of raising a family, of being a friend, or managing our lives? I confess that I so often feel like I don’t know how to come out or come in! It is with this enormous humility that Solomon says, I don’t deserve where I am, I cannot do this well on my own, all I ask is for “an understanding heart to judge thy people to discern between good and evil. And it was pleasing in the sight of the Lord that Solomon had asked this thing.” So, God goes on to say that because Solomon didn’t ask for riches or long life but for understanding, “I have DONE according to your words. Behold I have given you a wise and discerning heart.”

So many things so cool about this. First, I love and adore and could pop over the fact that this is even faster than next day, overnight delivery. It was DONE. When we ask according to God’s will and from a place of humility, the answer is YES.

Second, Solomon did not have to go to God, GOD CAME TO HIM. Let’s all be very clear here. God has come to you. Jesus came and the Bible is your proof. Those words in there are true and real and sharper than any two-edged sword. They can change your life, shape your life. They can sustain your life. They are MANNA.

Third, Solomon did not have to put a plan together and then ask for blessing, Solomon went to God to get the plan. This is glorious news to the calendar-phobic. We can go to Him with a heap of people that we want to do right by and just ask, “Give me wisdom, give me understanding, because I can’t tell what is good and what is evil.” What mother does not cry out for this daily? Is there anything more valuable when raising your kids and making decisions for a family than understanding of what is good, what is wise?

But finally, and here is our point, Solomon was already eating the Manna when he asked. He was humble. He knew God had brought him to this point, he knew that God had made him king, he knew that God’s wisdom is more precious than wealth. He had already picked up the Manna that said ‘be humble and trust in the bigness of God’ - even as king. He had heard it, he had believed it, and he was living it. And that Manna blessed Solomon.

Listen to this: “Now God gave Solomon wisdom and very great discernment and breadth of mind, like the sand that is on the seashore. And Solomon’s wisdom surpassed the wisdom of all the sons of the east and all the wisdom on Egypt. For he was wiser than all men…and his fame was known in all the surrounding nations. He also spoke 3000 proverbs.” I Kings 3:29-32

These proverbs of Solomon were recorded and preserved and we have them today. They are Manna sprinkled on the ground for us to pick up and take in and live by. It starts with a prayer, “Father, I know that I cannot do this alone. I know that you have a better plan for me. I am so very prone to wanting to control everything and that makes me forget to trust you. I want to be wise in the way I live this life that You have given me. I want to live sustained by your Manna, your Love dropped from Heaven, your Wisdom that is neverending. Help me.”

It starts with the humility of knowing we don’t have it all figured out, and the hunch that God in fact does. And then we begin gathering the Manna ALREADY SPRINKLED DOWN UPON US and living by it.

For Monday Manna, September 22nd Read Proverbs 1 and 2. Take it slow, 5 -10 verses a day. Chew on them. Write out verses that tug your heart. Pray about how to live them out. Journal about them. Think about the simple truths detailed here – they are wisdom poured out to Solomon and then passed on to us.

Be careful that you don’t just check the Bible Study box, don’t just read them, don’t just gather the Manna and let it sit. Let’s try to eat it, to obey it. The Manna given from God in Exodus came with these words… “to test whether or not they will walk in my instruction.”

Proverbs 3: 1-2 “My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, for they will prolong your life many years
 and bring you peace and prosperity.

Feed well.